I thought about this for quite sometime, hesitating to put down thoughts on paper. I should really attempt this prompt. No, I shouldn’t. I could always try. No, I couldn’t. Opposite signals send out by my brain and me having to choose all the time. Sometimes good, sometimes bad. Wish it were easy; wish my brain would just make the choice, instead of me having to ponder the positives and the negatives. Yet another brain activity. Confused, that’s what I am half the time.
I am not confused between what I want when it comes to extreme opposites, but it is the in-betweens that are confusing, the gray regions that is neither black nor white. Choosing then becomes extremely tough. Am I weird? Or just human? Does everyone feel this confusion? Is it because my left-brain outstands the right? Or vice versa? I don’t know.
I am constantly confusing between the left and the right. For instance, I have always been a poor navigator; my brain reads left, I speak the word right. And so we end up in the wrong alley every time I am on the passenger side of a vehicle. I confuse my left hand with my right every time I look in the mirror while brushing my teeth. Only a second, hardly time to get noticed by anyone else, but I embarrass myself all the time. Why is that? I don’t know.
What I do know is this. I am a lefty who writes with her right and does everything else with her left. I was forced to change as a child, typical for lefties in those days. Lucky for me, it didn’t cause any irreparable damage. Just a bit of confusion and slowness. And of course, the feeling of being a handicap until I knew better!
Oh yeah, I remember accidentally handing over a piece of chalk to one of my teachers with my left hand, and getting reprimanded. Apparently it was disrespectful to use the left hand. I could never finish my exams on time; after-all I used my right hand for writing purposes. I hated joining my friend to assist her mom in the kitchen. It was supposed to be fun. We had to cut the veggies’, that’s all. But my friend’s mom always thought I didn’t know how to hold a knife since I was using my left! I got chided and had to use a hand I was never comfortable using to cut the veggies, always nicking myself in the process.
I am not confused between what I want when it comes to extreme opposites, but it is the in-betweens that are confusing, the gray regions that is neither black nor white. Choosing then becomes extremely tough. Am I weird? Or just human? Does everyone feel this confusion? Is it because my left-brain outstands the right? Or vice versa? I don’t know.
I am constantly confusing between the left and the right. For instance, I have always been a poor navigator; my brain reads left, I speak the word right. And so we end up in the wrong alley every time I am on the passenger side of a vehicle. I confuse my left hand with my right every time I look in the mirror while brushing my teeth. Only a second, hardly time to get noticed by anyone else, but I embarrass myself all the time. Why is that? I don’t know.
What I do know is this. I am a lefty who writes with her right and does everything else with her left. I was forced to change as a child, typical for lefties in those days. Lucky for me, it didn’t cause any irreparable damage. Just a bit of confusion and slowness. And of course, the feeling of being a handicap until I knew better!
Oh yeah, I remember accidentally handing over a piece of chalk to one of my teachers with my left hand, and getting reprimanded. Apparently it was disrespectful to use the left hand. I could never finish my exams on time; after-all I used my right hand for writing purposes. I hated joining my friend to assist her mom in the kitchen. It was supposed to be fun. We had to cut the veggies’, that’s all. But my friend’s mom always thought I didn’t know how to hold a knife since I was using my left! I got chided and had to use a hand I was never comfortable using to cut the veggies, always nicking myself in the process.
As I matured into adulthood, I began to rebel big-time. I didn’t get it. Why is there a differentiation? What’s wrong with left? Why is one considered negative over the other? I remember using my left hand on purpose, just to get back at those who caused me pain even though I was equally skilful with my right! I guess I finally learnt to balance and maybe even become dexterous. But the confusion always rears its head when I least expect one. And it always bothers me, is it normal? Or is it because I am a lefty trying to perform with my right? I don’t know.
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In response to the prompt from Sunday Scribblings.
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12 comments:
I learnt to use my left hand when I dislocated my right elbow. I could do most work but I couldn't write. Not on paper but on blackboard, I could.
As a teacher, it was very important to be able to do BB writing.
Having that dislocated elbow helped me in a way.
As for youe question, it is random sometimes when we don't know which path to follow...
My eldest is a lefty and my father was ambidextrous. Me, I'm right, right, right -- all the way to my dopey brain! I'm sorry you were forced to change hands, that always struck as unbelievably cruel. I remember reading that by 10 weeks foetuses are already one or the other.....how amazing! Thanks for the read.
People seem to have an irrational fear of anything that deviates slightly from conventional norms. When I played baseball as a boy, I throw right handed but batted lefty. Every year, my coaches tried to switch me over to the other side of the plate, because everyone else hit right handed. Why a six year old who did things slightly differently frightened grown men is still beyond me.
Excellent post. I really enjoyed it!
I agree. It's not the big issues, the black and whites, that confuse me but the grays. Yes. I get that. Yes.
UL,
Your problem was all too commonand all because of nearsighted human behavior. Thank goodness it's now adroit to be gauche. Now you're the more talented one; being ambidextrous.
It's a wonder any of us turned out normal. ;)
rel
that is interesting ...!
this is interesting 'cos my son seems to prefer his left hand for most activities and the elders go 'cluck..cluck'...:(
there are times when i take a l'il time to decide right /left and i always thought it was due to lack of focus...now i know its not due to my nonexistent driving skills..:)
I love your posts - you're so normally inquisitive - Thanks YOU! I've tagged you if you can cope ;~)
I too am left with a sense of the anger and frustration towards adults. Why is it that people demand that children be identical in every way?
Rose
xo
I don't understand why left was considered so bad neither. It must have been torturing for you - I try to imagine if people had forced me to write with my left hand and it just feels so strange!
I know some people that confuse left with right too - even I sometimes hesitate a little. It has gotten better in time, when I was little it was more confusing. Perhaps it's simply related to the language issue and associating the words with the sides.
you leftys are unique individuals!! :))
Nice job capturing the conflict and confusion.
Mad Kane
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